Now that we’re all “moved in,” I am beginning to think our belongings may have come alive in the Uhaul and rapidly multiplied. Somehow, everything fit into our old house and yet will NOT fit into our new, larger house.
When we began the time-consuming process of packing up our house, I was determined to do it properly. Cardboard boxes were neatly and meticulously taped. Treasured belongings were delicately stacked. Breakables were wrapped, and unwanted items were donated or trashed.
About 20 minutes later, my attitude transitioned from “I really care about the packing process” to “just throw this crap in the truck and let’s call it a day.” The thing about houses is, they’re great at making you forget how much useless garbage you own. Much of the stuff has been untouched for months. Is there a reason to keep it? Probably not. Will I still toss it into a box and carry it around for years? Yes. Absolutely. How many cigarette lighters can one person have, seriously? Are we going for a world record? Nobody here even smokes. How does at least one bobby pin end up in every single drawer? Did it rain bobby pins at some point? Why do all the world’s mismatched and misplaced cords end up in my closets? MAYBE ONE DAY I WILL NEED THIS CHARGER FOR A 2003 MOTOROLA RAZR. LET’S GO AHEAD AND SCHEDULE ME FOR SEASON 45 OF HOARDERS.
It got to the point I began considering whether it would be better to just burn the place down than deal with organizing everything for transport to our new house.
This story has no ending.