Trying and Failing

You guys, I like REALLY want to be a runner.

I am so envious of those people who consider themselves runners. The people who enjoy getting up at the break of dawn, lacing up those sneakers, and setting out before the rooster crows to burn some good old fashioned calories. I WISH I could do that.

But the painful truth is that I would much rather stay snuggled up in bed with my kitties all up in my face than brave the 6:00 AM roads or smell a stranger’s arm pit at the gym, just so that I can fit into a smaller size pair of jeans.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m lying to your face. I’d LOVE to fit my 42 inch hips into a size small bikini by this summer, but girlfriends, that just ain’t gunna happen.

The point is, I try. I try and try and then I stop trying. And then I start trying a little bit, but then I realize how bad trying sucks, and how much I really HATE running. Why do people like running? What appeals to ANYONE about running? It sucks. Running literally sucks. (I apologize for using “literally” in this context) It sucks out all my energy. I think it even sucks out tiny pieces of my lungs, little by little, through my pores.

I am destined to be a compulsive over eater with giant hips and a deep seated aversion to most forms of exercise for the rest of my life. How lucky is Mike?

Tags: Life of Late

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Compulsive snacker. Bleeding heart. Unhealthy obsession with Tom Hanks and cats. Florida State and Syracuse University alum.
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  1. Reply

    i am SO with you on this. i have tried and tried to like that shit. but to no avail.shit is boring. [and hard]try yoga…it is 'easy' and way more relaxing.

  2. Reply

    Don't get discouraged! I hate running as much as you do, and I too, want to be one of "those" runners. Back in January I started the Couch to 5K program… and it has taken me 6 weeks to do 3 weeks of the program. If I don't feel like doing it, I don't force myself. But it is motivating knowing that I can run 3x longer now than I could 6 weeks ago. Don't give up 🙂

    • asj
    • February 9, 2012

    I hate it too – people who enjoy running freak me out… it's so unnatural.and yes, Mike is one lucky man!

  3. Reply

    Girl, I'm right there with you. The Boyfriend gets up at 5:30 in the morning to go run 4 miles because "it feels so good." I sleep in for exactly the same reason. I tried to be a runner – I even ran a 10K last spring – but I hated every minute of it. We can start the Not Runners Club.

  4. Reply

    i hate running so much. i've tried to like it. i just suck. and my body hates me the day after i run. ugh.

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